Proactive vs. Reactive: Do you prevent fires or put them out?
10/3/2012
These two different approaches in life can literally make or break you. If you want to learn how to prevent problems instead of fixing them, then read on.
We are all a little bit of both, proactive and reactive, and there is a time and a place for both. If you strive for success in life, relationships, and decision making, know this: you need to learn the habits of the proactive person.
So let’s get started. How do you know which reaction rules your life? Answer these questions to get a better idea of which category you fit into:
1. Do you speak before you think, or do you practice the pause?
2. Do you react poorly to criticism or do you find a way to view it constructively?
3. Do you ask before you assume?
4. How do you handle disrespectful people?
5. Have you ever considered fixing the process and not the problem?
Our reaction to a situation literally has the power to change the situation itself.
Habits of the Proactive Person: First and foremost the proactive have the mind set of being someone who prevents problems instead of having to fix them. They think ahead. They make action plans. They dialogue. They use logic V.S. emotion to problem solve. The proactive person doesn’t blame or make excuses. They take charge of their life by being responsible for their part in it.
Being proactive means being reactive ahead of time. You are simply being preventative. We all are preventative in ways. We brush our teeth to prevent nasty dentist visits. We fasten our seatbelts to be safer in our cars, etc. So why not use this proactive, preventative approach when it comes to other aspects of our lives such as relationships, family and workplace?
When you can’t control what’s happening around you, I challenge you to control the way you respond to what’s happening around you. That’s where your power is. That is the first step in becoming Proactive V.S. Reactive.
For example, if you are going to a family gathering where you know there might be conflict, plan out how you are going to NOT REACT EMOTIONALLY. You could also have a code word and if needed also have a smooth and courteous exit plan. Revisit the problem when emotions are in check. If you’re proactive you don’t wait for circumstances to get to an unhealthy, unpleasant, damaging and hostile place. Proactive people change the things that can be changed, rather than trying to treat the symptoms. Proactivity is the act of thinking ahead. Prevention. Follow through. We ultimately have the choice on how we respond to what happens to us in our lives and it is our reactions that determine how things affect us and the people around us. Start making action plans and follow through with them.
Now, On the other hand, an emotionally reactive person has no plan. They do not think before they speak. They just react. This is the #1 tell of the reactive personality type. It’s detrimental. Squash this habit now.
Because the reactive personality has no forethought or plan, it’s safe to say that emotions run their lives. These emotions create drama and a false sense of “victim”. The victim always operates from the defense. Defensive emotions always result in finger pointing and blame. It’s a vicious circle that snowballs into negative reactions such as anger, hatred, jealousy, embarrassment, disrespect, etc. Being an emotionally reactive person causes so much pain, bitterness and isolation in our lives. None of these emotions serve anyone or anything, so why not take a different approach?
Remember, your reaction to a situation literally has the power to change the situation itself. Your choice.
Choose Prevention. Plan ahead. Think logically not emotionally. Make an action plan.
Taking a proactive approach is positively life changing. It is the best way to take charge of your life, creating the best possible environment for the best possible outcomes.